If you leave any door open or don’t clean you will eventually get pests. I regularly go to factories that have every garage door open and they wonder why they have mice. I also go to bars that have inches of syrupy goodness underneath all the appliances and they can’t understand why they keep getting fruit flies. Exclusion and sanitation is the main form of pest control.
I’m in forestry: more trees does not make a healthier forest. Healthy, well spaced trees with inconsistencies make a healthy forest. Yes, it’s necessary to remove trees to improve the quality of habitat and lower risk of wildfire. No, we are not all money hungry tree murderers.
Graphic Designer here: We need a **vector** version of your logo, or at the very least a **large** image of it. No, we can’t “blow up” that tiny pixalated one you use in your email.
When arc welding, you must protect all your skin from the light, not just your eyes. The light is the real danger, not the heat. Welding unprotected is like putting your face right in front of a tanning bed of steroids
Radiographer. People get x-rayed in order of need. Just because you were first in line with your broken pinky doesnt mean that you get served before the skull fracture
When you take out a loan to purchase something, then you return it, sell it, cancel it, or whatever…. You kinda still need to pay off your loan. It doesn’t go away when what you bought with it does.
Work at a credit union:
I’m not asking for your ID to personally offend you or imply that I have authority over you. I’m asking for it because *I will get fired if I don’t*.
Lawyer. The biggest issue I see with the general public, and within my client company, is that just because you’re mad, doesn’t mean you’re right. More specifically, just because you’re mad, doesn’t mean you have a legal basis to take action. Telling me your feelings about fairness, inequality, etc. isn’t the same thing as actually stating a claim.
Museum security. No I don’t have a gun, I’m here to tell you where the bathrooms are not take a bullet for the monet. No, no one tries to steal the artwork I have to be here because you absolutely will try to touch that million dollar painting with your greasy hands.
I work at the front desk of a hotel. I don’t understand why people get mad a room is not ready at 8am when we were sold out the previous night! I constantly have to explain that check out time is at 11, and that check in time is at 4!! I cannot kick a guest out of a room that they are entitled to for the next 3 hours!
It is not a teacher’s job to potty train your child. You need to work on that at home before they’re ready to start school. Some classes have 30+ kids, we just can’t take the time to work on things like that with your kid when there’s 29 other kids who also need attention.
Call center employees really do not have the option to transfer you to the President/Owner/CEO of the company, no matter how hard you complain. You’re lucky if you even manage to get transferred out of the room they are in.
There is absolutely no aspect of shoeing a horse that hurts it. We’ve been shoeing horses for around 2000 years now and providing I do everything correctly (which is why we have a 4 year apprenticeship in Britain) our dear quadrupeds won’t feel a thing.
A good bakery will have fresh products every day. If you come in the late afternoon, they will probably be sold out of many of your favorites. Also, if you come early and buy all of the chocolate chip cookies no one else will get any that day. The remedy to both of these problems is ordering in advance.
Don’t try and guess the letters on the eye test chart.
The whole point of the exam is for us to give you the best vision possible, surprisingly enough that relies on us knowing what you can’t see.
Dogs understand Always and Never. If you have a rule that they can’t beg for table scraps, get on the couch or jump on people but you let them do it occasionally, they will never understand why you correct or yell at them. Also, if you hire a dog trainer please remember that about 80% of the training is directed toward the owner and 20% toward the dog. We just tend to say it in a way so as not to offend you. Some people just cannot fathom that THEY need the training and that dogs will simply follow suit.
I got a couple:
As 911 I still do not have your exact location unless you call me from a landline. I have a general area but when I ask you to verify an address just do it. It helps us get to you quicker.
I cannot get an ambulance to you in 2 minutes. Surprisingly there are other people with emergencies as well.
I can not give you medical advice when you call 911. I can help you with certain things like CPR and EPI pen usage but not much else.
You cussing at me and calling me stupid because you’re speaking too fast for me to hear your address is not helping.
I cannot tell my crews to go in without lights and sirens. You called 911 they’re most likely comin in hot.
No, I can’t diagnose you or tell whether you have naughty thoughts by looking at your brain scan. Also, if you were only using 10% of your brain, you’d be pretty much dead.
Oceanographer here. Climate change is a thing, and we are causing it. We can see the effects. I have literally gone to coral reefs that have bleached and the reason is because the ocean has become more acidic. We did that.
Respectfully, get your heads out of your asses.
Historian: “Truth” is always relative, dependent of the perspective of the truth-teller and always constructed in some capacity. Every source must be subject to critical assessment.
Safari Guide – dangerous animals can literally be anywhere, including right next to the vehicle and you may not be able to see them. Don’t think that you can walk around unsupervised because you can honestly be attacked if you don’t know what to do.
If you just exercise regularly you can prevent a majority of physical, psychological, and physiological issues. Source: am a physical therapist.
The horrific amount of plastic we go through in science. Also not all research is about curing cancer or other diseases (which contributes regularly to my existential crisis but I digress)
The strength of alcohol when measured Alcohol by Volume (ABV %).
You switched from a 4% beer to a 5% beer?
“It’s only 1% increase, *right*?”
4% -> 5% = a 25% increase in strength. You’re getting 25% more pissed.
Never write an email you don’t want read back to you in a deposition.
Never say anything bad in writing. I’m a lawyer who does primarily white collar and commercial/securities litigation.
Even if your email is not relevant or admitting wrongdoing, someone somewhere is eventually going to read it. For example, the other day I read 5 Valentine’s Day emails from the same guy to 5 different coworkers… c’mon man.
Just because you signed up on the organ donor registry does not mean a team will run in when you die and take your organs. In fact, there is only a remote chance that you will die in the rare criteria necessary for donation to take place.
Everything is a chemical.
No, natural does not mean it’s safe or better
I can’t make the damn milky coffee any hotter because then it boils and when you boil milk with a steamer it either curdles or burns, and then you complain and I have to give you your money back and/or make you another coffee that you will INSIST I boil
Antibiotics are not a treatment for common cold/flu
Pets need dental care. Also the fact that they are still eating and not making noise does not mean infected teeth don’t hurt.
Do Not Resuscitate does not mean I am going to kill MaMaw. It means that if it is her time to die, as evidenced by her lack of a pulse or breathing, I do not break all her ribs in an attempt to keep her alive which will, likely fail because she is 30kg and demented with stage IV lung CA with mets to her bones and brain.
Just because I’m an engineer doesn’t mean I can fix and understand everything.
There are 40+ different types of engineering degrees.
A chemical engineer may not know how a bridge works. A mechanical engineer cannot clone you. A biological engineer cannot tell you how many cats you can fit in your house without the floor collapsing.
Not every person diagnosed with Autism is f*****g Rain Man.
Also, I cannot make your child magically talk in a few months. Speech is not a behaviour that can be changed through behaviour modification.
Note: This is toooooootally just my personal opinion from working in the public sector. I’m sure there are a lot of wonderfully qualified individuals who have the time and skill to teach it as a behaviour. Most publicly funded places do not and I’m speaking to that.
I am a tech support.
We are not gods.
user: “My mail server is down”
Me: “We are aware of it. Its a general issue, one server is down. We escalated the issue to the people in charge of server and they are working on a fix.”
User: “BUT I NEED IT NOW, FIX IT”
I work in the financial sector.
Yes you do need to provide proof of your income. No-one will lend you huge sums of money without knowing whether you have the means to repay it.
Should have made it clear I am in the UK
Patient Transporter for a hospital here. If you have any kind of fall risk like possible stroke or whatever, we have to put a gait belt on you and make you use bed/chair alarms unless you sign a waiver. Otherwise, if you fall, and that gait belt isn’t on, we are instantly very fired. Quit making my life miserable and let me just put the damn belt on. Providing for my fam overshadows your stubbornness. Where I work, if you are wearing a yellow armband, you will be wearing a gait belt. Men are the worst when it comes to this.
Astronomer here! We don’t actually just sit up all night looking at stars. No one actually has that job. Instead, like most things these days, I download data from telescopes off the internet that an observer takes for me and analyze them in my office. I have literally published papers using data taken by telescopes I’ve never seen.
There are definitely still some telescopes you need to visit to take data, but they are fewer and fewer these days.
All that white “smoke” you’re seeing from the local industrial plant is water vapour.
Don’t have ANY water contact when wearing your lenses. Especially swimming. I get you can’t see, but no, this isn’t a valid excuse for threatening your sight by swimming in lenses. I’m not doing this to be difficult!
And no, just because you’ve done it for years without any problems, doesn’t make it okay!
The “deals” you see, particularly in a flyer or Holiday Event, are most likely pre-planned deals. Some of these items are also bought specifically for that flyer or event, meaning the advertised price is the just the base price.
You’re not savings as much as you think.
Biggest misconception I’m facing right now is the need for exfoliation. Y’all exfoliate way too much. Most people only will need to exfoliate once a week, twice ONLY if you have an extreme sebaceous output and even then it’s a big maybe.
I get so many clients with a ton of constant breakouts saying, “But I wash and exfoliate every day!”
Well, there’s your problem. Your skin thinks it’s not producing enough oil because you keep removing it, so it over-produces. That’s why you’re breaking out.
Also I want to add, there’s a big difference between dry skin and dehydrated skin. Dry skin is usually genetic, and has to do with your sebaceous glands not being able to produce enough oil so that oil needs to be supplemented. You can be a dry skin type and still be oily.
Dehydration is just that there’s not enough water content in your skin, and really you just need to be drinking more water.
A lot of people get some dehydration like in the winter and start treating their skin as “dry skin” and end up with more problems when really they just need more water.
Your tax refund is not a mini lottery. Excluding certain credits, you cant get back more than you had withheld.
I’m a translator. Sure, maybe you don’t like my rates, but I assure you that your relative who spent a semester as an exchange student in Spain will not deliver quality work. Maybe you know a second language, but translation involves techniques more complex than knowing how to order a beer in Spanish.
As a CNA caregiver for the elderly, I’m not just responsible for your loved one, but likely 10 or so others. Im sorry if you or your mom had to wait 15 minutes for me to come, but that doesn’t mean I was slacking. I was with another person or maybe 5 that called before you. We are underpaid and under staffed, I’m trying my best to help everyone, -not- just one person. Im not a personal caregiver.
Just wish people knew, they get mad and I understand, but I work my butt off and sometimes don’t even take my break to help and then get told why’d it take so long.
Work in a hospital. There will ALWAYS be a wait time to be seen in the ER. A three hour wait is typical. There are always going to be patients who need to be seen before you because their needs are more urgent. Also, EMS is most likely bringing patients in that you can’t see while you’re sitting in the lobby, so those people will also be ahead of you.
Waiter/cashier here. I understand your food is taking a long time, and I genuinely feel bad about it, but theres literally nothing I can do. Sometimes orders get backed up, sometimes we have cooks in training, sometimes managers just leave during a big rush and we have to play shorthanded. Getting pissed off at me cant make the new guy cook any faster
Defibrillators don’t shock a dead heart back to life like you see in the movies. They shock a irregular BUT STILL BEATING heart into a normal rhythm.
Just because we can do it well, doesn’t mean it’s easy and you can just pay less or worse, demand it free.
That therapist have their s**t figured out and don’t need therapy (we don’t and we do and most of us have our own therapists and would be lost without them)
Hospitals are a workplace for some of us. We also need to take lunch breaks and want to leave work on time.
Paramedic. We’re not “ambulance drivers” who turn up and take your relatives to hospital no questions asked. Nor are we here just to check your child over because they grazed their knee. Stop and think: am I likely to die if I don’t have this ambulance? If the answer is no, then you don’t need the ambulance.
There is no such thing as a “regular haircut” or “typical little boy haircut” or things like that. These phrases mean absolutely nothing to us. What one person thinks is a regular cut another person may think is not. Please don’t treat us like we have no idea what we’re doing when we politely try to get you to expand a bit on these phrases, so you don’t have a haircut you hate.
There is no such thing as good, quality box dye so please quit asking for suggestions on that. The ingredients and level of control a stylist has with professional hair color will always out weigh any box dye.
In the same token, don’t expect to have healthy, beautiful hair and long lasting color if you’re using Pantene. Quit asking for my suggestions for “good drugstore shampoo for colored hair”. It doesn’t exist. We’re not just trying to sell you product when we say this. Hell, I’ll send my clients to Ulta for their crazy sales on professional shampoo just so I know they’re using good stuff.
Oh, also, you’re always taking a risk when you buy salon-only brands at drug stores or amazon. It’s completely possible it’s not even the same product, just a re-used bottle. Or expired. I’ve seen professional products on grocery store shelves this year that were discontinued 5 years ago.
The positive effect of environmental regulation on the air quality in the US over the last 30 years is so great and has so much data to support it that it should be impossible to argue against these same environmental regulations in a political arena.
It’s not always the case, but I have worked long enough in the service industry to know that if you’re somebody that typically gets bad customer service, you’re probably a bad customer.
A scientific paper/journal article does not necessarily prove anything, especially on its own. Lots of poor quality science gets published, and even good experiments are part of the wider research and don’t mean the clickbaity headline is true. Journalists and people who argue on the internet take note.
Run out of your prescription for prescription only medication that you’ll die without? We can’t help you. We are not Doctors. Maybe ask for your prescription earlier next time? Don’t leave it until the last minute and then scream at me for your error?
Bud Lite spent a lot of ad time during the Superbowl shaming Miller for having corn adjuncts. Well, Bud uses rice adjuncts, and both corn and rice do little to flavor. They’re meant to boost alcohol so that neither company spends much money on malt, which is where most flavor is derived from. That’s the real reason they taste so s****y.
Bud lite also shamed mead. F**k you, mead is amazing. It’s the drink of the hero! It’s probably as old as beer is, too. It’s not a drink for wimps, it’s a drink for Vikings.
You should all know there’s better booze out there than factory beer.